by Patti
Last week, I had one of those days at work where I just couldn’t keep my eyes open. The clickety clackin’ of my co-workers’ keyboards and droning hum of the a/c just about quietly stroked me into a coma. So I decided that during lunch I would see if I could squeeze in a quick power nap to rejuvenate.
As soon as lunch rolled around, I headed out to my car, which was parked in the company lot. The lot is small and I didn’t want to risk anybody coming out and seeing me in a prone position with drool sliding down my face, so I thought it would be best to move my car to a different location.
I drove down the street and pulled into a large parking lot, found a shady spot and pulled in. I pressed the button to move my seat into a lying down position, cracked the windows so I wouldn’t suffocate, and aaaaaaaah, laid my weary head down.
Just as I was about to drift off, “CHK-CHK- EEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!” My eyes flew open and I sat up to find a landscaper wielding his edge trimmer inches from my car. Really? OF ALL THE SPOTS IN THAT MASSIVE PARKING LOT, he had to pick my NAPPING SPOT? I looked around and saw a huge landscaping truck in the distance, so I decided that that parking lot in general would not be a good a napping spot. Aware that my lunch time was dwindling down, I drove off in search of a new napping spot. A couple of blocks down, I spotted another parking lot with plenty of shady spots, and pulled into one of them. I looked around and didn’t see any trucks, mowers, or edgers, so I happily laid back my seat again and settled in for a nap.
As my senses were starting to calm, suddenly I heard a big lurching sound, so I popped up to find a LANDSCAPING TRUCK pulling in a few spots down from me. A couple of guys jumped out of the truck and started quickly unloading all those evil lawnmowers and edgers and other Keep-Me-Up tools. Unbelievable. I turned the key and once again pulled out in search of a safe place to sleep.
I drove into a shady neighborhood and starting cruising the residential streets for a house to park in front of, but I felt, I don’t know, stalker-like, and worried that somebody would knock on my window and see me looking dead in the car and call the police. SO, I finally pulled into a parking lot with no trees or grass close to my office and pulled into an isolated area against a brick wall. I had 20 minutes left for a little shut-eye, so I immediately laid down my seat again and closed my eyes.
Within seconds, I was drifting off. That is, until a car alarm somewhere very nearby started shrieking. I heard some frenzied footsteps, then a couple of female voices and some shuffling around, a few “Bloop-Bloops” of somebody’s key remote and the alarm finally stopped. But by then, it was time for me to get back to work.
I wearily raised up my seat and attempted to repair the damage of 1,000 interrupted naps by smearing on some lip gloss and fluffing up my hair, and then I started back for my office. As I was pulling out of the parking lot, another landscaping truck was passing by. I could swear the driver winked at me.
