Dancing with the Devil

by Cathy

"Bullfighting is the only art in which the artist is in danger of death and in which the degree of brilliance in the performance is left to the fighter's honor."

“There are only three sports: bullfighting, motor racing, and mountaineering; all the rest are merely games.”

 "Bullfighting is not a sport; it is a tragedy."

-- Ernest Hemingway

The above three quotes are all attributed to Ernest Hemingway. He refers to bullfighting as an art, a sport and a tragedy, respectively. For the purposes of this post, I'll take the unbiased, middle ground and refer to it as a sport. For me, bullfighting has always been synonymous with Hemingway. He made his love of Spain and Cuba evident via his novels, but specifically first brought attention to bullfighting in his novel, The Sun Also Rises.

While on vacation this past summer in Mexico, our trip coincided with a bullfighting tour. For years my husband had tried to time our visit to Mexico for this, but it wasn't to be the case until now. He eagerly, happily, excitedly plunked down his pesos and got tickets for our entire family to attend. 

I hadn't given specific thought to bullfighting. I just knew it involved a matador (or torero, as they chanted in the arena), a bull and a fight between the two, which may or may not result in the death of a bull.

The fights we saw were held in an all-season arena, in the evening, so there was no sun/shade seating to be chosen. The Plaza D' Toros was not an overly intimidating arena but there was a foreboding light within its walls and the faint smell of metal and animals. Interesting Fact: Bullfighting arenas are always round so as not to give the bull an opportunity to corner the fighters.

The performance began with a welcoming parade; basically a two-horse buggy where the horses have elaborate headpieces and the buggy holds two young, beautiful girls waving to the audience as this chariot makes a few laps around the arena. Obviously, geared towards a male audience, although the audience boasted a healthy female attendance. The two women seated behind us were louder and more demanding than most of the male spectators.

The bullfighters enter the ring to the sound of a live marching type band and gracefully yet firmly walk over to the side of the arena with the President's balcony. They are colorfully and elaborately dressed in their heavily embroidered capes, black hats and flamboyant garb of a unitard and a bolero jacket. They raise their hats in a salute to the President and the crowd. The arena empties, the band stops playing and there is an eerie silence. All eyes are on the huge, wooden, bolted door that leads to the bullpen.

In the midst of the dead silence, the sound of running hooves is heard before the door swings open and we see a 1,000+ pound bull charge blindly and ferociously into the arena. It's oddly quick for its hefty size. The expert spectator sitting in front of us, upon learning that this was our first bullfight, was more than eager to explain to us the process, the meanings, the traditions and reassure the children to not be afraid. This was a welcomed comfort for us. "These bulls are bred to be vicious," he explained as he watched my girls' faces. "They are bred to be fast, strong and to kill."

The first fight was with a bullfighter on horseback. I will spare you the details of this, but all I can say is that he did such a terrible job, he broke down in tears afterwards due to the dishonor he brought forth to the sport, got booed by the audience and left us traumatized. I was this close to taking the kids and leaving. Our fellow spectator guide explained: "This is not the way this should be done. For bulls to be killed in the ring, it should be an honor. He dishonored this bull by killing it the way he did. It should be clean, effortless and honorable." Let's leave it at that.

The remaining fights were with the traditional matadors. Watching these, when done right, I understood what our guide was trying to explain. Much like witnessing the proverbial car accident, at times I found myself not wanting to look away.

I realized that during each fight, I would go through a whirlwind of emotions - at first rooting for the matador when the bull charged out with such might that he could easily gore anyone in its path; then twinges of nervousness and sadness when the bull was weakened by the banderilleros as they pierced darts into the bull's spine; then mesmerized by the "dance" between the matador and the bull - my favorite part - whereby the matador "dances" with the bull, standing within inches of it as it charges into the muleta, or cape. One matador bravely "hugged" the backside of the bull as it twisted and turned in circles around him. It was a beautiful, artful display of man versus beast, this dance with the flowing red cloths and the matadors standing steadfast, poised like a ballet dancer, yet leaning in towards the bull, feet firmly grounded like an athlete.

Lest we forget, bullfighting is an extremely dangerous sport. We almost witnessed the death of a young matador-in-training during our event when his nervousness caused him to trip and fall backward, causing the bull to charge directly into his torso. Were it not for protectively padded horses and the banderilleros coming to his aide, he could have died. That is the point when I realized that this is real. That this was more than a sport. That anything can happen. That we can be witness to someone's death.

This is why the final act of the killing of the bull left me conflicted: it's kill or be killed. It's just a shame that it even needs to come down to this. But therein, my friends, lies the controversy of bullfighting in general. Interesting Fact: Banderilleros can only lance the bull head-on and a bullfighter can only kill the bull directly from the front. Depending on how honorable the kill is, the President decides the prize for the matador, usually in the form of one or two ears from the killed bull.

"I am not going to apologize for bullfighting. It is a survival of the days of the Roman Colosseum. But it does need some explanation. [Bullfighting] is a tragedy. A very great tragedy. The tragedy is the death of the bull. It is played in three definite acts. The entry...the planting of the banderillos...[and the mastering of the bull with the muleta which leads to the death of the bull.]"

- excerpted from the Toronto Star Weekly, columns by Ernest Hemingway, 1923

http://ehto.thestar.com/

As I thought about what I had seen that night, I couldn't help but recall Jack Nicholson's famous line as Joker in the 1989 movie, Batman, asked by him of all his prey, right before killing them:

"Ever dance with the devil in the pale moonlight?"

Some prefer to call this a blood sport; others call it an art. There are many advocates and critics of this sport alike, for obvious, respective reasons.

It's the fight fought since the beginning of time itself: man versus beast. I will leave it up to you to determine who's the devil in this delicate dance.

Bullfighting is the only art in which the artist is in danger of death and in which the degree of brilliance in the performance is left to the fighter's honor.

Ernest Hemingway

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/ernesthemi400630.html#6kW9mt22MI5qhe71.99

Bullfighting is the only art in which the artist is in danger of death and in which the degree of brilliance in the performance is left to the fighter's honor.

Ernest Hemingway

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/ernesthemi400630.html#6kW9mt22MI5qhe71.99

Dream Boating

by Cathy

It has always beffudled me that as a true Chicago native, born and raised, I have yet to know anyone who owns a boat here. Maybe it's because those people are few and far between, given that owning a boat is an incredible investment to make since Chi-town's temperatures don't allow for boating nine months out of the year.

Now, I've been on my share of boats, ships, catamarans, water taxis, fisherman's boats, speedboats, paddleboats and even kayaks, but not once, ever, have I boated my way out of a Chicago harbor. Until this past weekend.

We were invited to come aboard by the parents of my daughter's classmates. We'll just call the dad (and owner of the boat) Dr. DJ because although he's a dentist by day, he moonlights as a casual DJ, playing gigs at our school functions, on his boat or at his house. In his past life, he must have been Jimmy Buffet although he resembles an older version of Sean Cassidy with long, sun-blonde, streaked hair.

As we prepared for cruising, we made sure all coolers were secured in place, all kids had their vests on and all hands were on deck. Literally. Once out of Diversey harbor's safe walls, Dr. DJ punched it to full throttle ahead. Our hair whipped around us wildly as Lake Shore Drive was zipping by and the skyline became a watery blur. Although the jet skiers were loving the hilly waves we were leaving in our wake, my girls were a little freaked. This was the first time on a speedboat for both of them and after wailing the entire way up the shoreline past Navy Pier, Ari finally settled down enough to go from frantic to clutching scared:

to first captain:

Come aboard. We're expecting you.

After the whirlwind fly-by lake tour, we turned the boat around and headed to where we were going to drop anchor for the afternoon - a quiet, shallow spot further north, off the beaten waters and away from the beachgoers. We tethered our boat to another boat, (a friend of Dr. DJ) and spent the day frolicking San Tropez style. The kids took turns jumping into the water off the bow; they went paddleboarding:

they went kayaking:

And the adults took in the precious last rays of summer, with a drink in our hand, a smile on our lips and a sway in our stance as we danced to tunes courtesy of Dr DJ. Think I'm kidding? Behold:

Yes, that is a mirror ball.

"Wow!" I exclaimed. "This is a serious party boat."
"Aren't all boats party boats?" Dr. DJ yelled back over PitBull's drumbeats and raps.

I guess they are. After all, isn't that what Charo was doing on The Love Boat?

Capten Estubean! Cuchi Cuchi Coo!!

While we might have been one Charo short of a true Love Boat experience, we had no shortage of Captain Stubings, Isaac the bartenders or even Gophers, as we waded back and forth between the boats sharing libations and laughs.

Towards the end of our stay, I sprawled on the spacious, custom-made bow cushions, closed my eyes and imagined I was boating off the coast of France somewhere, and if I squinted hard enough, my imagination turned the skyline's buildings into majestic mountains hugging the waters. I let the waves rock me into their rhythm as I took in nature's wonders above and below me. What a beautiful day to dreamboat.

Hopalong Cassidy Joe

by Cathy

In the course of one week, my husband had the stomach flu, celebrated his birthday (while he had said flu) and nearly broke his ankle playing basketball.

Late on a Monday night, the back door creaks opens and in hops Joe with the help of two guys he plays basketball with (while I sat lounging in my robe and turban-like towel wrapped around my head, fresh out of the shower). He fell into an armchair, his face distorted with pain. I looked down at his right ankle. From mid-shin down, bulging out from the bandage below it, was a lump the size of a half grapefruit. His foot honestly looked like some kind of Elephant Man deformity. He was wincing in pain and trying to adjust the ghetto bag of ice the guys threw together at the gym: doubled up fruit market bags filled with ice that was now melting and leaking through at a rapid pace.

After a brief rundown of the accident and the tossing around of remedies to help him (apparently this has happened to one of these guys three times) they left. With the closing of the door, Joe's macho guard dropped like a dead weight. He let out a long, screaming moan, which he was obviously stifling since he fell. His ankle looked bright red and I swear it was pulsating. I set him up with a chair and pillows to elevate his foot, refilled the ice into a clean freezer-sized Ziploc bag and let him try to calm down. When the ice had numbed it over, we weighed the options of when to go to the ER and decided to wait until the morning.

A quick visit to the ER the next morning rendered his ankle surprisingly NOT BROKEN but he had a badly pulled outer ligament (high ankle sprain). The doc gave him crutches to get around and ordered him to rest, ice and elevate. He had to lay low and couldn't drive or even play basketball again until he got an okay from the doctor.

This sounded like a prison sentence to Joe, who is a MAN and has gargantuan PRIDE and is fiercely independent and generally doesn't do well when he is sick. His days consist of constant sitting and shifting and elevating and he complains frequently that his ass is constantly hurting and numbing up from all that sitting. The first day it was extremely painful for him to take his foot down from elevating it. I was busy working and going to parent/teacher conferences that day and couldn't get his pain meds filled until 8pm. "I NEED DRUGS!" was how I was greeted when I finally got home that night.

Getting used to the crutches is a whole other ballgame, as he fumbles with the awkwardness of getting it right and turning corners. The first day, while I was at work, he decided to hop around the kitchen on his left foot instead of using the crutches, when his left foot suddenly gave out and he fell, pretty much on his swollen, bruised, wrapped up, jacked up foot. Apparently he let out such a scream that it freaked out Ari and she began crying while Bella was trying to help him up. What a scenario.

I ran a bath for him that night and trying to figure out how to lower him in while still elevating his foot and not getting it wet. That alone was a mission of SWAT team proportions. You see, his foot needs to be not only elevated but iced cold pretty much the whole day, so inserting it into the scalding bath water that Joe prefers to bathe in would probably cause his clubfoot to explode, so it had to remain out - at least for that night.

It's been almost two weeks now and he's gotten the whole hopping/elevating/icing/stairs/crutches/bath routine down pat.  In the meantime, he's getting more frustrated at being cooped up and I've had to stifle numerous one-liners and other comedic references to his situation for two reasons: 1) his annoyance with my unwarranted comedic relief would feed his frustration, and 2) KARMA. I don't want that bitch coming back to hound me down.

Buuuuuuttttt.....the girls and I just can't resist. I've bit my tongue many times but as we hear him rickety-racketing his way down the hallway with the crutches or being greeted by his giant, rainbow colored foot elevated on pillows stacked up to the ceiling every time we enter a room, we can't stop ourselves. The remarks, which tumble out upon inception, have been too varied and too numerous to count - peg leg, clubfoot, old man Joe, Crutchety Kyle, Hopalong Cassidy, Hoppy Papi, My Left Foot, Shrek Foot...

All we're doing is trying to make this bearable for everyone, most of all Joe, right? Laughter is the best medicine, isn't it? I just hope that Karma, that bitch, is laughing right along with us on this one instead of taking notes.


Side note to readers: I would have posted a picture of his foot, but seriously, it's so ugly and so gross and so ugly...I will spare you.

Side note to Karma: The fact that I didn't post any nasty pictures of his foot, chalks up some good, non-Karma points in my favor, no?

Zipping to the Extreme

by Cathy

As you may have read in my last post, I was off in Cabo last week on a "business" trip. In the midst of what turned out to be more leisure than business, checking in first at this hotel for two days:

Sheraton Hacienda del Mar Golf & Spa Resort, Los Cabos

 Then at this hotel for the final two days:

The Westin Resort & Spa, Los Cabos

 I did something EXTREME.

Of all the words I can think of to describe me, "extreme" is definitely not one of them. In fact, my middle name should be  "middle-of-the-road" or "medium" or "moderation" or "non-extremist". I don't do anything in extremes - I like being right smack dab in the middle. That's where I feel comfortable; that's who I am.

However, my whole Cabo trip was about stepping outside of my comfort zones - traveling alone; being comfortable alone; exploring new places; meeting new people; trying new things - alone. So wouldn't it be fitting that I did something I would not normally be prone to doing within my comfort zones? Yes, it would. So, I did. And what did I choose to do? Zip Lining. Yes, I willingly signed up for the Costa Azul Xtreme Canopy Tour. (Notice, the word Xtreme.)

The funny thing is that I didn't even realize this was an Xtreme sport until I got there and the instructors rigged us up in our harnesses, secured the clips that would support my weight as I dangled hundreds of feet in the air above cacti, burning desert rock and slithering rattlesnakes -  and ran through the drill. That's when I went into full-on panic mode. You see, since I landed in Cabo, where I was trying so hard to take in the beautiful scenery and revel in the ocean air, the looming zip lining activity kept nagging at my vacation state of mind, not allowing me to truly relax. I was so stressed about how I would handle it, I surveyed everyone in my path about it: the guys sitting next to me on the plane, our tour guide, our host, all 12 of the other folks on our tour, the hotel bar waiter, the unassuming couple from Minnesota baking next to me on the pool deck, swimmers wading past me in the pool...

I took diligent note of all the feedback (all of it reassuring and positive and FUN!) and wrestled back and forth between zip lining or just sticking with good old kayaking (I had done it in the past, albeit it was on a river, not the Pacific Ocean) and it seemed "moderate" enough. After conducting my thorough, unscientific focus group,  I decided to just stick with it. This trip was all about pushing my boundaries after all. 'Just buck up and do it, Cathy, dammit.'

On the morning of, I was surprisingly calm. The decision was made and I was at ease with accepting it. Once we got there, I applied my 30th coat of 50 SPF. (I started applying this the minute I woke up that morning because the thought of being up high in the Mexican hills with the Mexican sun beating on my pasty Chicago ass for three hours straight terrified me. In fact, I almost wore a long sleeve and long pants - a tunic and scapular shy of becoming Cathy, the flying, zip lining nun.) I'm sorry, I've gotten some crazy ass looking sunburns in Mexico - painful, ridiculous looking sunburns that could pass for geographical maps and airport runways. Thus, the fear. Not. Good. So I slathered to the point where I could slip right off that zip line. Also, not. good.

What seemed to calm my nerves somewhat is when I spotted grandmas, grandpas and two children (a nine-year old and an 11-year old) in the crowd. Yes, I did ask them their ages. Okay, if they can do this, I can do this. I took the pulley by the horns, stepped onto the platform on the mountainside, crossed my ankles, lifted my knees to my chest, leaned back in my harness and let the guide push me off the edge into the wide open air. I shut my eyes and screamed like a baby...for about 10 seconds.

This was taken by our tour's "Paparazzi" guy. That' me being Xtreme!

Then I realized that the speed was not as zippy as I thought it would be, so I opened my eyes and and took it all in. I thought about what the instructor said: "This is the closest you'll ever get to flying." I saw the Sea of Cortez off in the distance and the turkey vultures (no joke) tauntingly hovering overhead, waiting for me to plunge to my thorny death on that cacti and do what they do best. But seriously, by the end of that first zip line, I was hooked. Literally and figuratively speaking. I wanted more. I wanted higher. I wanted longer. I wanted faster. There were eight zip lines in total and I took in the sensation and exhilaration to the fullest.

All was great until our instructors said there would be a rappelling portion of the tour. Rapelling? Where you dangle off a platform on a rope that you, yourself are controlling and releasing to drop you - or shoot you - down 150 feet onto the ground below all while bouncing yourself off of a jagged rock wall lest you cut up your knees, a la SWAT team style? Too much to think about but since I was on a high from zip lining, I thought, 'What the heck.' But when I saw those go before me and how they were shaking, and pushed off that ledge and saw one lady come back with a rope burn on her hip, my 'What the heck' turned into 'What the hell??'

I was the first one to unclip myself from that wire holding me on that platform, turn on my heel and say, "I'm out. I did what I came to do. This is a vacation. I don't need the stress." Unbeknownst to me, there were twenty others from our group sitting this one out. And wouldn't you know I started a trend. Three more walked off that platform, one by one, after me, while an over-confident dude checked them off, "Another one bites the dust."

Well, that was my point. I didn't want to literally bite that dust waiting for me at the bottom of that cliff. Too much of this activity was left to my physical abilities and sporty know-how, and I was in no position to be fully left in charge during this Xtreme sport.

Overall, I can view this experience as "I chickened out on rappelling" or "I went beyond my comfort zone to the point where I was so proud of myself and felt content at trying something so out of my league."

In my eyes, I chose to fly.